Guest #7: Emi Kurara (aka Kurarin). Interviewed by Tsukifune Sarara.


Hello, everyone! It has been a long time since we have met. Speaking of a long time, what about Hikoboshi and Orihime? Finally! The time has come when the two of them can meet! Once each year they see each other. I would like to romantically contemplate their love while writing a wish on a short piece of paper. (Note: the legend of these characters is celebrated during the Tanabata festival in July)

Well then, this month’s guest is my Moon Troupe’s cutie, Emi Kurara~! Because you, Kurarin, are an extremely interesting person for me personally, I’m gonna ask tons of pointed questions. (suppresses a smile)

*Try to forget even about eating*

Kurarin, you’re naturally spaced out. (Note: this is supposed to be a pun on the words "boke" and "tsukkomi" in manzai comedy).

“Huh? Am I spacing out?”

If you’re aware of it yourself, doesn’t that mean it natural? (laughs) Well then, on to the important things. You are level-headed, aren’t you.

“Sometimes I’m told that…(laughs) I tell myself I’ve got to be strong. There are many things to do, and I’m desperately living my life amid all that. Maybe that makes me look like I’m level-headed to the people around me? I’m overwhelmed by the things I’m doing to the point that I’m about to collapse, but I don’t have the spare time to collapse. Recently I’ve slowed down enough to be able to see my surroundings a little, but…(laughs)”

Could it be that your seeming lack of interest in eating comes from the fact that you don’t have the time to be interested?

“I have had times when I forgot to eat, like when I become too obsessed with something. But I don’t forget to sleep! For the sake of my concentration, and because I believe sleeping is work.”

Your ability to concentrate and to even forget about eating surprises me! Readers, even if you frequently don’t have enough time to eat, forgetting to eat doesn’t happen very often, does it? To have something you can be so engrossed in must be happiness.

*Try weeping in front of people every now and then*

You are very stoic, so you probably never think, “I’m sick of it! No more!”. Ah, but come to think of it, you cry occasionally, right?

“I’m the type that holds in a lot until it builds up, and then it happens that suddenly a tear falls. (laughs) I end up not knowing what I’m doing, what I want to do. There was the time when I was allowed to dance a tango at a dinner show. I was having trouble with my expression, and no matter what I did I couldn’t bring my heart to the surface. So I turned to the teacher, saying 'I can’t do it!!' and started crying and stamping my feet in frustration… That kind of thing happens to me once per performance. Afterwards that teacher and I spoke a lot with each other, and the teacher kindly resolved my problem by telling me, 'You worry too much about what people around you think. It’s okay to enjoy yourself more.' "

When I see you crying, for some reason I feel better. It’s because I can see that, in a good way, you’ve broken down and opened up. I think then, “Ah, those are the positive tears of someone who is alive and persevering.”

*Become someone who people ask with a grin, “Did something happen in your private life?”*

Previously, when I went to see Rika’s (Shibuki Jun’s) concert, your eyes were so bright and beautiful that backstage I asked, without thinking: “You were incredibly beautiful…did something happen in your private life?” (I’m an upperclassmen who has an awful way of asking questions). But really, you were so transformed that I had to ask.

“‘Did something in your private life change?’ is something I’m asked a lot (laughs). It’s probably because until now I’ve been so frenetic that I didn’t know what it meant to have fun. Both on stage and in my life. Of course, my life right now revolves 100% around the stage, so I can’t think about anything else, but… Until now my time on stage has been fun, but the process of building the stairway necessary to get up there was painful. There was a severe difference between my ideal and what I could do in reality… But recently, I finally recalled that I came here because I liked it, and I noticed that I’d forgotten how to have fun. For now, I’m living my life having chosen the happiness of Emi Kurara over that of my other self that bears my real name. But in the very end, I think I want my self with my real name to be happy.”

Even before there have been many times when you made me think, “Something inside has really changed!” It’s stunning. You always change dramatically from the inside. That’s probably why all of us in the troupe can’t take our eyes off you.

*Feel a little loneliness, too*

“Occasionally when I return to my family home and just chill by myself, I sometimes think that this is happiness, but other times for some unknown reason tears come to my eyes… Maybe it’s because I’m too busy. But you all are busy too…”

Kurarin… That’s a serious illness. That is, everyone has times when they feel something like an unfounded, incomprehensible loneliness. But I think that to some degree, everyone goes on climbing up the stairs while finding a means to console themselves, to draw out more energy from themselves. But, from that time in your youth when you hadn’t found that means yet, you’ve made it all the way to where you are now, right? Your Uncle Sarara is very worried about you, Kurarin.

“But I don’t hate it, it’s just that I’m driven into a corner. The tougher things get, the more I crawl until I rise to my feet. On top of that, I receive a proportionate amount of happiness from the stage, so in the end it all balances out. Besides, even though the contents may be different, everyone carries around the same anguish and suffering inside them… I think that’s something I must not forget.”

Previously I had the opportunity to speak with a painter, and what I felt then was that all people who create something are lonely, but without solitude they can’t create anything good, either. So maybe feeling lonely sometimes is just about right… I mean, if your stomach is always full, you can’t understand true deliciousness, can you?

*Know when to stand out*

Could it be that during your time at the Music School you were the type of student who never got angry, no matter what happened?

“Actually, I erased the sense of my existence, those two years! *laughs* People are like, ‘What, you were there?’ (laughs) There are times when I get angry, but only so much that no one else knows the truth of those feelings. I was a quiet kid, and so I imagine that if my neighbors from back then saw me singing and dancing like this they would be very surprised! (laughs)”

But no, you’re fine the way you are. I admire that type of person in particular because I feel they truly are performers. The difference between who they are on and off stage is wonderful. Their transformation creates friction, and that friction turns into energy, which then becomes the charm of the performer! (Uh oh, I wonder if that was another incomprehensible Sarara statement…)

*Set your heart free*

You are full of charm yourself, Kurarin. Who do you think has a wonderful aura that makes you feel, “Wow, this person is amazing!”?

“Occasionally there’s a person in town or someplace who is brimming with energy. Maybe it’s their lifestyle… They have their own intentions and freely do the things they want to do. I guess their heart is free? If I think about it like that, then someone who lives their life thinking that they have to open up their heart doesn’t have an aura, maybe. When I was preparing for the Takarazuka Music School entrance exam, I focused on my goal so intensely that there was nothing else. When I wonder why I was accepted, even though there was no reason to take me, I think it must have been because I had that frantic intensity.”

Now that you mention it, I have to admit that there have been times when I end up feeling like I have to do something, even though I’m doing it because I want to. Perhaps it’s our own selves that make our hearts feel trapped.

Kurarin holds unlimited strength within her small body, it seems. No matter how stoic she is, she never goes wrong. She has a strong will, but is very friendly and kind to others. Even after graduating from Takarazuka, those clear eyes will still be twinkling. Kurarin, thank you for sharing all those deep emotions. Please treat me well until the end.